Minggu, 31 Maret 2013

A Very Pagan and Buddhist EASTER (video)

Dhr. Seven, Pat Macpherson, Ashley Wells, Wisdom Quarterly (Easter, 2013)
Monumental Kwan Yin, Buddhist temple, Adelanto, California (J*Phillips/flickr.com)
 
Fertility: Ēastre, the Stork, bunny, angel-babies...
Easter is said to be the most important religious feast in the Christian liturgical year. Forget the birth (when Santa Claus and the Stork conspired to bring the star child into the world so we could all have Christmas); the real miracle was not-dying.
 
It is believed by Christians to be the rebirth of Jesus (St. Issa), which would mean he died-died, but he didn't even die. Surviving the relatively common torture ("passion") and returning to the Jewish trading outpost in Kashmir, India, the great sage grew old (some say 120, even 150), passed away, and was buried/entombed where (Rozabal) his remains are worshiped to this day by the local Ahmadiyya Muslim Community.

Queen of Heaven (PearlsInTheEternity)
  • Rozabal (रोज़ाबल) is the name of a Muslim shrine located in the Khanyaar quarter of the city of Srinagar in Kashmir two graves, one on top of the other. The word rauza means tomb, the word bal means place, often a landing place by a lake, hence "place of the tomb." Locals have traditionally referred to the main sage buried there as Yuzasaf (Yuz Asaf, Youza Asouph, "Son of Joseph"). The other is Mir Sayyid Naseeruddin. The shrine was relatively unknown until the founder of the Ahmadiyya Muslim Community, Mirza Ghulam Ahmad, claimed in 1899 that it is actually the tomb of Jesus /Isa/Issa the "anointed one" (christ, Greek, kristos) a belief shared by many Ahmadis and an increasing number of Christians today thanks to the discovery of Nicolas Notovitch and the scholarship of Holger Kersten.
Earth gives birth to bodies (Maui Almanac).
Now the Stork and St. Nick may not be part of the official Christian story -- certainly they are part of the popular fiction we feed our kids along with sugar-and-offal candies in Americaland -- but the tomb and trip to India are true.
 
Bhumi, the Earth Goddess (MS-M)
To "resurrect" one would have to do, and if there was no death, was there a miracle? Surviving crucifixion was as easy as bribing the guards, who would then pierce one with a sword to prevent one from drowning as fluid fills the lungs and drowns one in three days. St. Issa/Jesus was pulled down quickly and released at night. The cover story was he was dead, entombed, and lo and behold, it's a miracle: He's not there! He's dressed in Indian white -- appropriate to an Indian sage, a muni, a yogi, a dhyana-meditator. Jain monastics, Hindu priests, Buddhist probationer (anagarikas) and even intensive lay practitioners.

We know it seems sad that Jesus/Issa could have been a Buddhist, or practiced Buddhism, or even learned Buddhism. But it is a wonderful thing! He learned other Eastern philosophies as well -- Jainism (the other wandering-ascetic movement contemporary with the Buddha which survives down to this day) and Vedic Brahmanism, which became Hinduism, largely as expressed in it monotheism (interpreted not as there being only one god, because there are many, but interpreted as there being only one ultimate godhead as the source of all reality and all expressions through other gods and sages, Brahman personified as Great Brahma by the Brahmins).
 
Mahayana ("Great Vehicle") is essentially a form of universalism/"catholicism": the story of a second coming (Messiah/Maitreya) outshone by a feminine expression of spirituality, a mother goddess of mercy and compassion "who hears the cries of the world" (Buddhist Kwan Yin/Avalokiteshvara or Ashtoreth, the chief goddess or female divinity)... emerging out of the modern Near East. It did not begin with Buddhism. It is shared by Zoroastrianism, Mithraism (the pre-Christian Roman Empire's "Pagan" religion worshipping a resurrection figure, Mithras, who is essentially the template for the popular or PR "Jesus" figure the world knows about, the world recognizes as their own because Catholicism got where it got as the largest religion by appropriating everyone else's story, savior figure (Mithra, Maitreya, Messiah...), and even the miraculous life details (the Buddha-to-be, or Bodhisattva, in Tusita heaven prior to taking re-birth on Earth)...
 
The good St. Issa and modern Peeps (GPS)
Many Christians believe their miraculous "savior," a god incarnate, but not just a god rather an expression of the ultimate GOD, the Godhead/Godhood) occurred on the third day of a garden variety Roman torture ritual, crucifixion, around 33 BCE (before the common era). There was not enough time to die of the crucifixion itself. But Christian theology, using the PR Jesus, built an entire creed around odd astrotheological consistencies (best explained by Jordan Maxwell) in many  popular religions, even contorted to fit the story of the Buddha.

Easter is a movable feast with origins in Jewish Passover (a time of animal sacrifice when an innocent and unblemished or "pure" lamb was killed) and ancient European-Pagan rites of spring. 

Vile but very cute junkfood (phoodie.info)
Of course, nowadays many non-religious cultural elements have become part of the spring break holiday -- such as Peeps, which are made of toxic white sugar, gelatin (gelatinous boiled entrails of ruminant animals like goats, cows, and pigs). And those aspects are often celebrated by Christians, Neo-Pagans, Jews, and others.
(History) Decoding Vatican Secrets, killing John Paul I (see Min. 24:00)

Happy Easter


Happy Easter to all my Christian Faithful Readers. I'm really pressed for time today, so here's a lovely Sunday Semen - er, I mean Sermon for you all...











Or, enjoy the sermon with a friend if you like...




The trip is over and I'll be making my way back home. I should have a new post for you all on Tuesday!

Sabtu, 30 Maret 2013

The Hollywood Stars Must Be Crazy! (video)

I. Rony, Amber Dorrian, Seven, Ashley Wells, Seth Auberon, Bela, Wisdom Quarterly
As Women's History Month wraps up, who can answer an innocent child's question?

  
But I was going to start taking care of HER from now on!
GIRLS on HBO, is it helping the cause of women or harming? Hold on, shhh-shhh, it's coming on.
 
Looking Back at the TomKat
News of Tom Cruise, Suri, and Katie Holmes' divorce broke on June 29, 2012, one day after the actress filed paperwork to end their 5-year marriage. Let's look back at their history in a spotlight with Zimbio (photos, timeline). Scientology may be squirming, but not its leaders. The Thetan (a word L. Ron Hubbard defines as roughly equivalent to Buddhism's arhat, or free and clear/enlightened individual; some Scientologists define Hubbard as the Second Coming, the literal Buddha Maitreya) Cruise unfortunately is not a great businessman: He signed a billion year contract with the cult-like organization, which sounds almost as bad as selling one's soul to the Father of All Lies in Christian lore.

Actor James Franco ("Oz") is now a thuggish pimp (turning out former Disney Corp. Mouseketeer-tricks like Selena Gomez and kissing buddy Vanessa Hudgens), but he used to be a pornographer. The good kind. A documentarian of sex. And it cost him says the Vancouver Sun. Of course, Franco does more than create documentaries. He turns out performances that run the gamut.

L-R: Selena Gomez (blue), Pimp Franco, Mila Kunis, and Wizard Franco (LAT)


 
Happy Birthday, Stars!
Innocent Mouseketeer Selena Gomez (wwtdd.com)
Justin "Thug Life" Bieber is at it AGAIN, wearing gas mask disguises, going shirtless, talking S, exposed for having cheated on Selena with Rihanna, and getting into fights. He failed the fans abroad, arrived late to lackluster shows, and came back to suburban Los Angeles to test drive his newly delivered Ferrari.
 
A neighbor, not happy about the most popular boy in the world going 100 mph on the quiet streets of Calabasas, told him to stop. The Beebs spit on him and threatened his life. Police are investigating the battery. He just turned 19 and recently lost his race car to loaning it to rapping drivers with few driving skills.

"National embarrassmentt"
As Elle Macpherson and Kevin Ryder (of Kevin & Bean fame) turn half-a-century, The Beebs' disreputable friends have turned his California mansion into a den of pot-smoking iniquity, which we guarantee he knows nothing about. And reformed thief Lindsay Lohan is at it again, except this time she's 100% innocent because she would hate to end up in jail like billionairess Paris Hilton. Sadly as a result of heartbreak or egomania, The Beebs, a Canadian national, has become a "national embarrassment."

The least "country" popstar there ever was, TayTay performs a dubstep version of "I Knew You Were Trouble" at the 2013 Brit Awards.

Tadolf Swiftler: BULLY
Lady Gaga, crippled but still kicking at 26, is taking a dive in the popularity polls. But she'll make a comeback once heat from twin 21-year-olds like Taylor Swift and Adele dies down. Taylor is in over her head attacking professional comediennes like Tina Fey and Amy Poehler. She's still bitter about losing a kid Kennedy, but it's so much worse losing a fellow popstar. She should have known Harry Styles was trouble, trouble, trouble when he walked in. Poor Harry! He took a shoe in One Direction straight to the Styles.

One Direction's Harry takes a fan's shoe to the Styles. (Ouch!)

But, allegedly, that shoe provided him more action than Tadolf ever did. She can't hold down a boytoy because she's a goody two-sh... or, as current chart topper Jimi Hendrix (Billboard) might say, she's never "been experienced." True or not, that's her Hollywood reputation. Britney Spears falsely-enjoyed the same reputation for a long time. Thank you, Disney Corp. Where do you find them?  
Why won't Whites stop committing crimes? Not that race has anything to do with crime.

Ke$ha is an all-American Satanist
Is it satanic? Yes but "Ke$ha is to satanism as Twilight is to vampires" (Joshua Frazer).
 
Mara has many minions, daughters, Cupids...
(Ken Layne, TheAwl) Don't live fast but do Die Young: This is the new mainstream occultism. Ke$ha! "TiK ToK" was catchier, sleazier, more honest and more fun than Lady Gaga, but the pop tastemakers mostly dismissed Ke$ha as basically the garbage monster behind Winkies. Now Ke$ha has another sleazy dance-pop song, memorable and forgettable, and almost vulgar. The video was released last week and has just begun to swirl around the paranoid-paranormal websites.

Ke$ha shows off new penis suit (FFS)
People are outraged by the occult sex magick dance orgy held within a Catholic Church at night. This is a Black Mass, with Ke$ha as High Priestess. And it looks much better and is so much more entertaining than the dreary old Black Mass of the Old World Occult. Satanism isn't about a literal Satan, because who cares? It's about living. It's the way we live now! The Old Satanism involved a lot of heavy black robes and biblical-sounding mumbo jumbo. The Black Mass is just a reversal of the regular Mass, and all of its emotional power comes from the illicit shock/delight in reversing Catholic/Christian symbolism. Light is dark, below is above... If you lack even a lingering belief in the traditions being parodied, the only sexy thing is the brief nudity... More

What's it like to be a star? Ke$ha reveals all with the help of MTV on "My Beautiful Life."


I said I was sorry.
Why do Kristen Stewart do how she do? Who can say? Here she herself explains, while the Hollywood gossip machine pens its guesses: Her life wasn't "crazy" enough. She needed more drama, more chaos, more attention. She's too young to play it safe, too old to walk away. 

My boyfriend doesn't understand me.
O, KStew, will you never learn? RPattz is running around on a set far, far away, not answering texts, not taking calls. What's a jilted lover to do to grab the limelight again and say to the world, "Hey, look at me!"? How about going out with Katy Perry's female assistant? Lesbian? Not!
 
Pornographer's Dec.-Jan. marriage
Hey, kids, be sure to catch me on Nickelodeon's Kids' Choice Awards! (vancouversun.com)
 
Tired of shooting stars? Watch falling stars
Tweens can't get enough of Taydolf: 10 Things We Didn't Know (tasteofcountry.com). And Swiftler reminds us that if you are not for her, you are against women. At least that's what Katie Couric told her. We hopehere's a special place in heaven reserved for dummies.
See Ultimate Girls' Fail Compilation 2012

Jumat, 29 Maret 2013

Who Knew?


I read a tiny article in the paper this morning - that's my ritual since being here: reading the paper with my morning coffee; I only regret that I can't be naked while doing so!


Anyway, it reports that a man got caught attempting to cheat on his agreed-upon probationary drug test by using a Whizzinator. It's a small, soft dildo that stores "medicinal grade" urine in a pouch, heats it to body temperature, and enables the user to pass a drug test. Well, of course, that got me to thinking...



If they can come up with a gadget like that, why not a Jizzinator? I standard erect dildo that ejaculates for men (and Ladies, too!) who miss the cumulative eruption when employing said type of toy. I mean, wouldn't that make sense?


Lo! and behold! there is such a thing... One called the Ejaxxinator - but, it got a really, really bad review, so I won't bother giving you the link. Then, one with no fancy name, it's simply called The Ejaculating Dildo. Suck it, it cums. Stroke it, it cums. Ride it, it cums. Whenever you're ready, you give the bulb a squeeze and it pops it's cork and unloads. Now what could be better than that?

Except for the real thing, of course!