Rabu, 29 Desember 2010

That’s Entertainment

or The Benefits of Jacking Off

In my various relationships with women, I found them to be… what’s the right word? …not straight-laced, or uptight, necessarily… but they don’t understand guys. I don’t mean mentally, or intellectually, though that’s probably true too. I mean, they don’t comprehend the way our bodies work and how our brains are connected to our dicks. I suppose it’s fair – we don’t understand them either. Maybe we aren’t supposed to.

I tried to counsel a co-worker, whose wife was pregnant and had cut him off with “get that thing away from me,” when he didn’t know what to do. I told him to just say “honey, I’m going to be in the bathroom for a while…” His response was, “she’s not happy about that either.” She won’t help him get his stones off and she doesn’t want him getting himself off? How ridiculous! I told him he needed ignore her and do it anyway. You know, maybe women need to become more comfortable with masturbation – on and for themselves. Maybe they’d finally begin to understand the benefits. (Are you listening, girls?)

Yet, when I think back, I realize when I would masturbate the ladies in my life got all pouty and hurt and displayed a “how come I’m not enough for you” attitude. And no matter how much you try to explain it has nothing to do with them, they just don’t understand. Because then they would invariably take it into the realm of cheating: “You may not be with someone else, but it’s still cheating.” Oh, Jesus H. Christ! All I did was whack off! It’s just…

Well, to be honest, it’s not “just” anything; it’s lots of things.

It’s the need to go off somewhere by myself and just be… me. Not to have to think about anything else, or anybody else; to concentrate solely on my own desires; kicking back to pleasure myself – to take as long, or as short a time as my current mood desires. A buddy of mine – no, not a j/o bud – once told me he felt masturbation is the ultimate experience. His thought process is pretty simple. “Nobody can do you the way you can do you.” And what he meant was this: When we whack our willies, we know what we want right there in the moment and we satisfy it. We don’t need to say “squeeze my balls,” or “lick my nipples,” or faster, slower, or make any other verbal command (request?); if we want our balls squeezed, we squeeze our balls. If we want our nipples licked, we wet our fingers with saliva or (most likely) pre-cum and rub our little nubs. If we want something shoved up our ass to hit our g-spot, there’s no “gross! I’m not doing that!” Make sense? Well… I thought so.

And, yes, I’ll admit, sometimes it is just because I’m horny and want to get my rocks off. If she’s not in the mood, or incapacitated for whatever reason, I should be able to satisfy that urge by stroking my cock without any measure of guilt. And I definitely should not have to hide what I’m doing by locking myself in the bathroom. I should be able to spread out on the bed and enjoy it.

Whether it’s a long, slow, hours-long session of worshiping my cock or a crazy-fast, death-grip, furious stroking to cum as quickly as possible I realize the full benefits of jacking off.

It can be as simple as a need to calm nerves and reduce stress. Let’s say I have this big presentation to make at work the next day. I’m nervous about it; all keyed up and I can’t relax. Dropping trou (perhaps in the men’s room, either standing at a urinal or in one of the stalls) getting hard and blasting a load of cum enables me to push the work concerns to the back of my brain. The pressure and stress go away.

It’s a way to get rid of excess, or what some consider “nervous,” energy. Like when you’re feeling itchy and you need to do something physical. A guy can burn off some of that energy with a good, long, intensely physical stroking session, the energy spent when he cums.

It’s definitely a form of medicine. A headache, or tightness in my shoulders or neck can be relieved, at least to a degree, by having an orgasm. I cum and those muscles relax. The endorphins released by my brain, as my body releases its man-juice, flood the brain and reduce the headache.

It extends life expectancy. Reducing stress is good for us, we’ve already explained jacking off will accomplish that task. Calm people live longer. It’s also been well-documented that men who jack off regularly reduce the risk of prostate cancer and has been proven to extend a man’s life by two years or more.

It’s an over-the-counter sleep aid; without having to resort to drugs. When I can’t sleep, can’t turn my mind off for whatever reason, even a quick release seems to help. There have been times I’m so freakin’ tired, so exhausted, but I’ll lay in the bed and toss and turn. I can’t get comfortable. With a nice soft, soothing touch I can work up a decent hard-on, cum, and I’m able to fall asleep.

It’s a form of… entertainment. It’s definitely a way to relieve boredom. I can keep myself busy for hours on end stroking, teasing, playing with my rigid cock, and fondling my balls. There have been occasions when the time has flown by, because all I’ve been doing is enjoying myself; stroking and playing to the edge over and over again. No different than spending two or three hours reading a book, or watching a film. It’s a nice way of passing the time when the power goes out – no electricity needed!

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